Welcome to BurgerTown
Now entering Burgertown, population: you. Humanity sucks. Climate change is destroying the planet. It would be better to live out your remaining days as a happy hamburger with beautiful crisp lettuce, onions, tomato, and of course a beefy slab of meat. This is not a real hamburger, only a costume. This means you can leave behind any guilt about methane, greenhouse gases, or animal cruelty. It's all fake, baby!
Remember to Practice Self-Care
Meat is not a good subsitute for self-care. Be sure to drink water and get plenty of sunshine. My friend Bree suggests eating an apple or meditating if you are willing to try it. Find new things to love about yourself and the people around you. Don't stress about your Halloween costume. Wear this fake meat. It is 100% polyester. Probably vegan, but I'm not sure. Hand wash if you can. Avoid bleaching or ironing. I hope you have a good day!
